I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
