Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize