is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Randomize
