the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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