Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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