You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
