Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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