that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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