So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
