I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm both gender and math confused
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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