Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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