To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
