I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
