When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize