i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
