you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
