Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
