im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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