I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
