I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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