ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
That's how pantless uber rides happen
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize