i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
