They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
