I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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