Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
