Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
