i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
