so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
