no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
