walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
