We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
There's always time for handjobs
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize