How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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