I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My vagina just recognized that song.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
