What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
