make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I believe in your delicious
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
