My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
