THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
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