laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
