i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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