I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize