Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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