why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
