Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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