Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
