we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
