I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
