Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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