I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
