Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
All the doctor said was why
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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