I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
