I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
it was like eating out sand paper
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
